As a teenager, still at school, I began meditating; I still vaguely remember my first meditations from that time. Strength and quiet, concentration—mostly at night. They were very special moments. I did not do it often. As a student I continued meditating very irregularly. I remember some of these meditations, mostly lasting 1–2 hours, as though they had just happened.
I always lacked the words (when I forced myself to name it, I reluctantly said transcendental); I also had no one I could have spoken to about it. Those around me quickly signaled that they found it odd, and so I discussed it only once. A housemate meditated together with me; that was good. Sometimes I met people who told me about “exercises,” about ‘methods’; it often sounded empty, technical, without real experience. I then avoided these conversations in turn. And so, ultimately, I never really spoke about meditation.
Here in Auroville it is different. Meditation is normal here. People do not speak about it much, but there is a shared understanding that it is good. If you say you have just come from a good meditation, you are received with a smile. I like that many situate meditation in Aurobindo and in the Vedas, the root of Hinduism and Buddhism.
Last week a woman came to the Center Guesthouse who seemed to come from another world. She had an incredibly powerful radiance. And although I am actually quite shy, I very boldly sat down at her table. The light in her drew me—Namaste. We spoke often over the next few days.
She was very present, spoke almost a little blissfully of her spiritual path over the past 10 years and of her doubts, of meditation, her seminars, her art. It was so light and authentic, sincere and radiant, that I could not escape this magic. After a few days she said she had just come from a month-long seminar consisting essentially of silence and meditation. No wonder she had this radiance, although I am sure she had it before too and will have it again. But it was so concentrated…
An encounter that gave an impulse for growth
I forced myself to keep my distance and nevertheless responded to her; she noticed this and was pleased. I responded with active dreams, with meditations of my own and the impulse to go swimming alone. The beach was wonderful, the water calm. I wanted to feel the elements. I swam out into the sea and was suddenly surrounded by hundreds of small, leaping fish that jumped onto my head, into my eyes, into my mouth and onto my nose. I laughed heartily—for minutes. I had the feeling of laughing with the cosmos. It was a deeply spiritual experience. Back on the beach, a fish fell out of my hair; gratefully, I returned it to the water. Afterward I briefly told her about it; she smiled and said: “So you had an experience of pure presence, nice…”
Two days later, in a meditation, I saw why I am in Auroville. I see differently, think differently, am more intuitive. A great deal feels so right—when I allow myself to reduce the local and global political conflicts to my scope for action.
She said she had come from the month-long seminar to share the light. That is nonsense, of course, isn’t it?
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